#12 months of bias

[spacequokka]

I'm so fucking soft for this man wtf

baekhyun in 2024 ♡

[cocotome]

I'm so whipped! Like, it's just 2 of his fingers and I'm scrambling to read what's going on lol! For those of you wondering, the Brilliant Hotels live reading is today in Shinagawa!

[matan4il]

I am at a loss for words.

A Jewish woman in Paris was kidnapped, held for several days, and raped for being a Jew, and her mother was psychologically taunted and tormented, as "revenge for Palestine."

And while the perpetrator is the main person responsible for this horrific crime, every single person denying or justifying the Oct 7 sexual violence is guilty of contributing to this normalization, making this antisemitic terrorist think his excuse is in any way an acceptable justification for this atrocity. Every single person who didn't believe Jewish victims, every single person who demanded proof, but turned a blind eye to the visual evidence Hamas terrorists themselves provided, every single person who called the films and pictures and testimonies from countless Israelis "propaganda," every single person who justified it and claimed that "rape is resistance." They're all complicit. They all have to know they've helped make Jews everywhere in the world less safe.

Speaking of complicity, even though a UN report found credible evidence for the sexual crimes committed by Hamas on Oct 7 and against Israeli hostages since, the UN secretary general, Antonio Guterres, has personally decided to leave Hamas out of the annual report on sexual violence in conflicts around the world. Israeli commentators expressed their belief that this was done, because had it been included, then the UN would have no choice but to finally recognize that Hamas is a terrorist organization. The UN is complicit. Guterres is complicit. Hold them accountable.

Speaking of the UN's known anti-Israel bias, what a surprise, their report on UNRWA, their own agency, claimed not to support the charges against it, though they did find that UNRWA has "some issues" maintaining its neutrality...

Just to make it clear, "staff publicly taking sides" refers to UNRWA employees being openly anti-Israel, antisemitic and pro anti-Jewish violence, and the "problematic content" in UNRWA textbooks is incitement to terrorism and educating Palestinian kids to be antisemitic. This alone constitutes more than "some issues with neutrality." But there's more. Out of the 12 Gaza UNRWA employees first identified by Israel as having participated in the Hamas massacre, at least three were killed inside Israel on Oct 7 itself, and at least one more was captured on film while helping to kidnap an Israeli young man's body from an Israeli kibbutz into Gaza using a vehicle with UN license plates. I'd say that's a bit more than "difficulties with neutrality". In fact, the UN itself implicitly recognized the evidence was damning, or it would not have fired nine of the twelve right away, and admit a tenth UN worker was dead following the invasion and attack on Israeli communities, while claiming they're still "clarifying" the identities of the other two killed employees who participated in the Hamas massacre. BTW, it's been about 3 months of the UN "clarifying" the identities of those other two dead employees (screenshot below is from the article published 2 days ago, link with same claim on "clarification" is from Jan 27).

UNRWA is complicit. There are other humanitarian aid NGOs, which can do better. Dismantle UNRWA. But we know the UN will not be dismantling the cash cow that this agency is, even though no other refugee group gets an equal treatment to that. At what point do we say out loud, that if more and more UNRWA employees are found to be complicit in a massacre or being embedded with Hamas, if Hamas terrorists have continuously used UNRWA infrastructure to store weapons and shoot at Israelis, if UNRWA was found to be providing a terrorist organization with internet and electricity, and if the UN can't hold its own agency accountable, then the UN is also complicit in UNRWA's collaboration with Hamas?

In Israel itself, as the biggest Jewish community in the world is celebrating Passover, attacks on Israeli Jews continue.

Two days ago, on the Eve of Passover, a combined terrorist attack took place in Jerusalem, in an ultraorthodox neighborhood, with two Palestinian terrorists driving their car into a group of visibly Jewish young people, then the attackers left their car and tried shooting at their victims, but the weapon thankfully malfunctioned. Three people were lightly wounded. (the vid below shows most of the attack, but not the graphic parts of the car hitting the young Jewish men)

Yestrday, the Lebanon-based terrorist organization Hezbollah launched three suicide drones at Israel's northern communities, along its Mediterranean shore. This attack comes on the heels of the news that out of 18 Israelis wounded in a previous Hezbollah drone attack on an Israeli Arab Bedouin town, one has died from his injuries, after fighting for his life for 5 days. It's 27 years old Dor Zimel, an officer who was stationed in that town to protect it. Dor was set to get married next month, and he had proposed to his fiancee with a ring donated by a bereaved father (his son, 23 years old Addir Messika, was a jewelry designer, and the ring was one he designed before he was murdered by Hamas terrorists at the Nova music festival on Oct 7). Dor's organs were donated and saved the lives of 7 people, including an injured soldier, who's also the father of a girl. May Dor and Addir's memory be a blessing.

And today, on the second day of Passover, an attempted stabbing attack was stopped before the Palestinian female terrorist managed to harm anyone. She was neutralized at the scene.

I'm sure all those who decried Israel having to continue its war against Hamas during Ramadan are being extra loud about this wave of anti-Jewish violence during Passover, which is actually just a partial list of the on going attacks on Israeli Jews during this holiday.

In other news, the preparations for the IDF's ground operation in Rafah have actually already started. Reports suggest 250,000 Palestinians who have come to the southern city as they left other war zones in Gaza, have already left Rafah, and that Israel has already started building encampments to house those it will evacuate from the city before the ground operation begins.

Trying to remember when have I ever seen an army building an entire camp city for the enemy's civilian population. I'm coming up blank.

This is Miri Gad Mesikka.

She lives in kibbutz Be'eri, together with her husband Eli and their 3 kids. On Oct 7, they locked themselves in the bomb shelter from the invading Hamas terrorists. They were in there for 12 hours, fighting for control of the bomb shelter's door, until the terrorists set their house on fire, and the Gad Messika family had to make an impossible choice: stay and maybe suffocate to death from the smoke (or worse if the fire got in), or jump from their second floor window, probably be injured and maybe be shot to death by the terrorists. Eventually, they chose to jump out. They all got injured, and one of her sons got his leg broken, but the terrorists didn't spot them, and this decision saved their lives. During the time they were locked inside the bomb shelter, Miri recounts how she would see some of her friends and neighbors not responding anymore, and she couldn't know why. She kept hoping it was because their phone batteries ran out. "Today I know some of them were being kidnapped, while others were being murdered. It was a massacre, happening in countless different spots at the same time." One of her friends told Miri, that her daughter, a baby who was less than one years old, was shot in the head right in front of her. Then the friend's husband was murdered as well, and despite being shot with a bullet in her lungs herself, the friend somehow managed to get herself and her two other kids away.

Never forget.

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[jenscx]

ATTENTION — kim minji smau

being the music bank mc has its pros. being able to meet your bias, interacting with other idols… too bad your partner is the only idol you hate; kim minji.

STATUS LOADING… finished!

TAGS — fluff, angst, idol!minji x idol!reader, enemies to lovers, secret pining, mubank partners, cursing

UPDATES — wednesdays and fridays

! IMPORTANT ! this fic is not an accurate portrayal of the kpop idols mentioned. everything stated is fiction.

CHARACTERS… IVE lost my mind | hyein antis

00. prologue

01. confrontation

02. annoyingly pretty

03. weverse live

04. dating rumours

05. shut up

06. nightlife

07. ok translator

08. STOP BEING GAY

09. eye contact

10. kys loser

11. fancams

12. feeling: devious

13. yn’s downfall

14. hiatus

15. fav album?

16. cheer up baby

17. i wish you would

18. YNJI REUNITED!

19. moment of weakness

20. BALLS IN YO MOUTH

21. #featured

22. yo chat

23. downbad spiral

24. liam pain

25. honesty

26. god forbid

27. wsg dawg

28. unnie

29. jinnie

30. alpha side (half-written)

31. feral over you

32. insane rizz

33. forrealz

34. situationship OVER.

35. let’s go!

36. a question (half-written)

37. three months curse

38. ynji moments

39. ynji moments pt.2

BONUS. yn’s playlist

40. favourite idol

41. holy shit

42. just friends

43. yujin was right

BONUS. playlist #2

44. first wlw heartbreak

45. the 1

46. we got this

47. snooze by sza

48. triple texted

49. d/milf hunter

50. yes or yes?

51. good morning

52. hanni the therapist

53. happy birthday

54. letting go (half-written)

55. movie night

56. wonyoung’s talk (half-written)

57. sheldon the turtle

58. ure trippin

59. coquette core

60. attention (half-written)

TAGS ! @ky-yk @urmom2314 @nasyu-kookies @limbforalimb @yoontoonwhs @be0mluver @lesleepyyy @eunhhh @edamboon @sewiouslyz @haerinfangs @impossiblesharkcashrebel @mightymyo @dexthzone @pandafuriosa60 @haew0nz @dmndtears @awkwardtoafault @hyehae @sserajeans @haerinkisser @chaerybae @yukianism @urwyf3 @xxsplatashaxx @kimsgayness @manooffline @yerisdumbass @jeindall777 @jiwoneiric @justme-idle @imthisclosetokms (closed)

[theoceansluvr]

Multi-Character x Birthday! Reader

warnings; me hating getting older T^T characters; percy jackson, connor stoll, annabeth chase, + leo valdez author's note; it's that time of year again where i grow up and absolutely DREAD IT. but ! writing this for the sheer joy of it all🩷 my birthday is actually tmrw i just wanted to post this earlier.. may write smth else for the day of.. side note - percy's was sorta based on things im doing for my birthday this year !

PERCY JACKSON -

OOOOO HE LOVES YOUR BIRTHDAY SO MUCH !

like genuinely, he's plotting his moves 5 months in advance !

he usually makes you gifts rather than buying them bc he's a broke high schooler(me too)

not the best crafter in the world, but it's the thought that counts right ?

he also brings you a bouquet of flowers that the Demeter cabin gave to him exclusively for you !

however, if you already have plans then he's 1000% on board !!

oh your going to a Yankees game ? he's already decked out in a jersey and cap. your going to a broadway show ? he's learning the soundtrack already + choreography for some reason

i think he'd take you under water for a little makeshift picnic thingy or maybe out to the docks at midnight

gives you the biggest, fattest birthday kiss EVER. with the addition of fish orchestra play your favorite song !

best birthday boyfriend ever; 10/10 !

CONNOR STOLL -

my absolute bias of a man, he would give you everything and more for your birthday which is usually swiped off of someone..

HOWEVER ! i like to believe he'd be a responsible person and actually buy/make you something for your birthday !

on the contrary to percy, i think he'd actually be a really good craftsman ! like he makes you a whole flower bouquet out of paper and you'd hardly be able to tell the difference

he wakes you up at the most unreasonable time so you can "make the most of the day !" as if he has a clue what he has planned

probably peppers your face in kisses to wake you up

or pranks you.. whichever floats your boat !

he goes with the flow and drags you around to all your favorite places and everything like that :3 even if it's somewhere super boring to him like the art gallery

if you're happy, he's thrilled !

also, your birthday cake is probably a chocolate little debbie cupcake with a candle

as stated, he's my favorite little man so he obviously gets bonus points !!; 12/10

ANNABETH CHASE -

MY GIRLFRIEND OF THE YEAR EVERYONE, SHE'S GIVING YOU THE BEST BIRTHDAY POSSIBLE.

literally NOBODY is going to be able to out do her for either gifts or experience overall

much like Percy, she's had this planned out for the longest amount of time. like she was planning this after your birthday last year

makes you breakfast in the morning because Chiron is a wee bit biased for her and despite the fact she never really leaned how to cook, it was reallyyyy good !! (she learned how to make your favorite for weeks)

anyways, she brings you breakfast in bed while explaining her whole itinerary of things she had lined up for you

she takes you to all your favorite places + food spots, she gets you pretty much whatever you'd like, and then she took you to a bonfire that night :3

she feels like a love letter writer for some reason, so please expect a handwritten letter on all the things she loves about you and why she appreciates you

maybe asks Ms. Sally Jackson herself to teach her how to bake so you can have your favorite flavor of cake :3c

either that or she buys a box cake mix and you make it together !

she's my favorite lover girl and i adore her; 1000000/10 !

LEO VALDEZ -

lastly, the man, the myth, the legend. he is making you the gift of a lifetime

makes you something with the most intricate design imaginable; jewelry, a book cover, maybe even a jewelry box of your into that sort of thing !

anything that would make your eyes sparkle, he on it !

probably does that advent calendar thing with all the trinkets he makes you up until the day of

needless to say, he gets WAYYYY to excited over you, so cut him some slack !

practically hangs on your every word on your birthday too(he always does but it's worse now)

oh you want to watch that movie about paint ? sure ! he'll even make popcorn even though it sounds beyond boring

he also cooks you your absolute favorite food and pretends he's on some Gordon Ramsay show to keep you entertained

ends the day with giving you that one of a kind, borderline art exhibit worthy gift he'd been working on with a very, VERY passionate kiss..

he invented the phrase "love to the point of invention" so he gets a massive: ∞/10

[saturnville]

do you want to, l. hamilton

pairing: he (lewis hamilton) x black best friend oc (anvika dawson) content: in which two friends cross a line people have been waiting for them to cross...and it works out. warning: 18+ content, angst, fluff, heavy dialogue song: do you want to by xscape an: part one here. part two here. their story is complete. thank you for reading <3 tags: @boujiestpoet @mauvecherie-writes @saintslewis @greedyjudge2 @vile-harlot @emjayewrites @ggaslyp1 @neeville

They hadn’t spoken in over a month. A bridge seemed to find its way between them. Not finding their way back to one another was unlike them. Most disagreements lasted at most three days. But, for there to have been 30 days of silence had her questioning if they’d come back from what they went through. 

But, after a much-needed therapy session, a cry session with Onyx, and deep reflection, Anvika realized that space was the best thing she could give him. She was challenged to put herself in his shoes and that changed her perspective entirely. 

“I want you to think from his perspective, Anvika,” her therapist began. She was an older Black woman with rich skin and silver hair. Her eyes were like honey and her voice was warm like the hug of an old church mother. “If you had feelings for him, right, whether you admitted them or not, and there came a time where the dam that contained all the feelings, emotions, thoughts, what have you, had broken and he was willing to drown in it all, just to turn around and downplay what occurred not even 12 hours later, how would you feel?” 

Ouch. Having it repeated to her without bias struck her uncomfortably. Anvika twisted her lips as she pondered long and hard. How would she feel? Rejected? Embarrassed? Used? Maybe all of the above. 

“What are you thinking about?” her therapist, Traci, asked. “And it doesn’t have to come out perfect or sound. Say how you feel.” 

Suddenly, her chest heaved as her breaths grew deeper. Her tongue circled her teeth and her eyes welled with tears. “I love him. I always have, in one way or another. But, I cherish what we’ve got and I just don’t—“ she sighed deeply. “I’m afraid for it to be ruined and I lose another man that I love.” 

Traci hummed. “So, you love him. Always have, you’ve built a good friendship with him, which could be a solid foundation for a potential romantic relationship, which he seemingly wants, but you’re afraid that it would go wrong and you’d lose him. What else are you afraid of?” 

“Just…that I won’t be more than a body to keep his bed warm. That’s why my ex and I split. Sure, we were together, but he was more invested in sex than he was in cultivating and strengthening our relationship. Intimacy is important, but only being desired for your body does something to a girl. I don’t want that…and so I’m afraid of being nothing more than a warm body. And now I’m upset because I teetered on my boundaries which were no sex with anyone that wasn’t my significant other. I don’t have a significant other, Traci. I have a best friend…or had.” 

Anvika’s voice shook as she spoke. She fiddled with the necklaces stacked around her neck. 3 gold necklaces—Queen Nefertiti, a heart, and the number 44. Traci’s eyes followed her hands. “What’s 44 stand for?” 

Anvika’s hands stalled. Her voice was quiet: “It’s his racing number. He races today.”

“You wear it often?” 

Anvika nodded. 

“Why?” Traci pressed, pushing her glasses above her head. 

“It helps me feel close to him when he’s away. He’s always away.” 

Another hum came from Traci. “Does he wear anything that represents you?” 

It was small. A simple word on his neck was often hidden by his braided hair. Completion. The definition of her name. He’d gotten it a year prior and never told her until she was helping him take his braids down and noticed the fresh ink there. Her heart grew three sizes that day. 

Anvika swallowed thickly. “My name means strong and complete. He has completion tattooed on his neck.”

Traci chuckled in amusement. Breakthrough was happening. 

“Sounds to me that the relationship the two of you have goes deeper than you’d like to admit. You shouldn’t beat yourself over the night you shared with him. We all have moments where we teeter-totter. And even though you didn’t want to, you did. But not only did you do it, you did it with a man who cherishes you, who honors you, who respects you. He is still your closest friend, but who is to say that your lover shouldn’t first be your friend? The choice is yours and I will walk with you through whatever decision you make. Just take the time to think about it, Anvika.” 

She’d thought about it every day since. 

+

Misery wasn’t a state he found himself in often, let alone one that he allowed himself to bask in. He was a firm believer in not allowing his circumstances to permanently alter his mood; his actions proved that he wasn’t the believer he thought he was. 

His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. His words were more limited than usual. His animations were not quite animated. He was going through the motions day by day, a boring routine that grew exhausting. He was better than this and he knew it. But, his usual methods of taking a run, spending time with loved ones, and giving in to his sweet tooth didn’t help. If anything, they made him feel worse. All because they were activities they did together. It seemed as though his entire life was attached to her and it drove him mad. 

He didn’t think there’d be a day where his mood would be affected by his disconnect from her. And it manifested physically. Lewis was tired often, which was a symptom of the fast-paced lifestyle, but for it to show in his eyes and the slowness of his movements was a clear indication that he was not okay. 

Lewis sighed into his pillow as his phone dinged once again. If he could throw it away, he would. His eyes glanced at the screen. Ani. The fourth message he’d received from her and the fourth time he wouldn’t reply. Not because he didn’t want to, but because he didn’t have much to say.

You raced well, it read. I hope you’re doing well…I hope we cross paths again when you’re ready. 

He grappled with responding. His heart yearned to speak with her but his mind overpowered his ability to pick up the phone. What would he respond with? Thanks, not ready to see you because you hurt my heart and made me feel rejected. Talk soon. He’d be damned. 

He did a double-take after a moment. You raced well. She watched? His heart twisted. She attended every race she could, amid screaming fans jumping for joy. He could still hear her strained voice chanting his name when he walked on the track. 

“Lewis!” 

His conversation with the gentleman ahead of him was stopped. The racer apologized graciously and turned to see Anvika at the top of the bleachers waving excitedly. It was her first international race and she was over the moon to be there. He chuckled and beckoned her down. 

She shuffled through the bleachers and was soon guided by a security guard to where he stood. She smiled widely. “So, how do you feel?” Her hands grabbed his own and squeezed. She was about to burst. 

“I feel good,” he said with a smile. “How do you feel?” 

“I’m so excited! I hardly ever leave the country unless it’s for business, so to be here and supporting you--so exciting!” The small bounce she did had the jewelry around her neck bobbing. His eyes dropped to her exposed collarbone--Nefertiti, a gold heart, and the number 44. Bright and shiny like it was brand new. His eyebrow raised. “That new?” His finger curled around the chain, tugging softly. The action had her stumbling toward him. 

“Oh, this?” she quipped. “Yeah. I’m not too much of a jersey girl but I couldn’t come without repping you at all. My hat’s up there with Onyx.” She pointed to the bleachers. She hoped it didn’t get swiped--she made him sign it. 

The smile on his face matched hers. For them to have been friends, she cared for him in ways that would have people assuming otherwise. Wearing someone’s name or number around your neck, closest to your heart, spoke volumes. And she’d chosen to do it for him. The honor he felt was immense. Lewis wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pressed his lips against her forehead. “You, my love, are a gem.” 

“Jeez,” he huffed as he buried his head further into the pillow. Soon, his pillow was wet with tears. He hated to admit how much he missed her. How much he craved hearing her laugh, seeing her smile, or feeling the weight of her when she’d fall asleep on his shoulder. He missed her. 

+

They crossed paths the following Monday after the Met Gala. Lewis was waiting in a lobby for his car to arrive when he heard her call his name in hopes he’d respond. It was an awkward reunion. Neither party knew what to say or what to do. Anvika was surprised he’d spoken to her and Lewis was gobsmacked at her beauty. 

“You look beautiful,” he said after some time.

She always claimed red wasn’t her color, but she proved herself wrong and proved himself right. Her dress was much different than what she normally went for and it only emphasized the impact she made once she hit the carpet. The scarlet red complimented the richness of her complexion beautifully and the rose-like details were stunning. And her heels were like liquid gold on her feet. She’d done her hair differently as well. Her dark brown hair was pressed and in an intricate updo that showcased her ethereal features from her dark eyebrows to her round lips. Anvika Dawson was a gem. 

Anvika smiled small, feeling flustered under his intense gaze. Her hands smoothed the material of her dress. “Thank you. You do, too.” And she meant it. He was an ethereal being. She often wondered if he was real. Her fingers clawed at her dress as she fought the urge to run her fingers cross his shoulder. 

He was dressed to the nines and in her opinion, had been the best dressed gentleman there. She always adored him in black. It made him look powerful and like the king of the room. And his skin, rich and golden, glowed beneath the ambient lights. 

Silence covered the two of them like a thin blanket--uncomfortable. Lewis couldn’t remember a time when he was uncomfortable in her presence…until now. Moments later, his security detail let him know the car was present. He prepared to bid his farewells but was stopped by Anvika’s hand on his arm. 

“Wait…are you staying at the hotel with the…” In a nervous ramble, she went on and on describing the luxurious building she was put in on behalf of her agency. It was 22 stories tall with the most beautiful lights surrounding the entryway, a maroon carpet leading into the foyer, and a surplus of botanical plants that made her feel as though she was walking through a palace. Lewis, amused by her nervous tangent, nodded.

Anvika’s eyes lit up with hope. “Will you…if you’re up to it…will you stop by, please? I-I’m on the 14th floor, room 44. Will you please just,” she sighed deeply and tore her eyes from his just momentarily, “I miss you, Lewis. And…”

And there it was. He stammered slightly and suddenly felt small under her hopeful gaze. He missed her too. He nodded once more. Anvika released the breath she had no clue she held and assured him she’d be there whenever he decided to come, just to let her know. Before he was whisked away by security, he heard her voice in his ears once again, “Thank you.”

+

Anvika’s feet nearly burned holes in the floor as she paced around her suite. Her thumb was in her mouth, a chewtoy for her nerves. Her eyes cut toward the small wall clock near the bathroom. He said he’d arrive within an hour. Two minutes late. Would he show up? Her heart was a snare drum in her chest as she contemplated her emotions. 

“Calm down,” she ordered herself, though it came out muffled as her teeth drug down the side of her thumb, pulling a tag of sensitive skin with it. She winced when she tugged too hard. “Dammit.” 

Then, there was a soft knock. Her head shot up and a gasp came from her. He came. Anvika frantically patted her hair, hoping that her bun didn’t look awful, and sped over to the suite door. She took a deep breath before pulling it open. She smiled small, “Hi.” She moved out of the way to welcome his presence. 

Falling into natural order, Lewis made his way toward the couch in the living area of the suite. He sat off to the side, nearest the right arm of the couch with his hands in his lap. She sat at the opposite end with her knees toward inward, brushing against his gently. His eyes were glued to the floor. The tenseness made her uneasy. 

She cleared her throat awkwardly and played with the loose strings at the cuff of her (his) oversized sweatshirt. “I had a therapy session not too long after everything happened,” she began. Her admission made him look at her. His eyes, once so full of life and love, were just as dull as the walls surrounding them. “We had what they call a breakthrough. You know, finally getting to the root cause of why we think, act, and speak the way we do. And it was humbling, to say the least…to realize that I hurt you in a way I never thought I was capable of.” 

She chuckled breathlessly but nothing was funny. Her tongue circled her teeth, a nervous habit, as she fought to keep the tears at bay. Lewis’ eyes, prickling slowly, stayed on her. 

“You left. And that hurt me. But you left because I hurt you. That hurt even more. And I am so sorry. You’ve been nothing but good to me and I let my own fears and insecurities cloud my judgment. I was so focused on not screwing up our friendship that I managed to do it anyway because I was neglecting how you’d feel, too.” 

He listened intently. So, she continued, “You asked what I was scared of. I never gave you a clear answer, not because I didn’t know, but because I didn’t want to be honest with you. And simply put, the idea of not only loving another man but losing another man that I love scares me. You already know I was in that messed up situation where I was nothing more than a trophy and a warm body. I didn’t want to be that for any man again. I swore I would never be that for any man again.”

Lewis’ eyes softened and for the first time since they sat down, he spoke, “You know you’re much more than that.” His hand then found its way to her thigh, caressing it softly. 

Anvika gave a closed-lipped smile. “And, um…I was upset because I had these strict boundaries, you know, no significant other means no type of intimate activity, right? I crossed that line with you and I beat myself up over it. In my head, I totally rejected this order I placed on myself and just felt internally guilty because at the time, I thought that was the beginning of experiencing heartache again. That manifested into a fear of ruining our friendship because we’d never crossed a line like that before. We went from friends to lovers in the span of 12 hours, and Lewis, that was a crazy shift.

“You always hear stories about people trying the relationship thing with their friends and they end up never speaking again. You mean too much to me for us to never speak again, so when I say I was miserable, that’s what I mean, especially because I put us in this position. None of this excuses what I did, but it was time to finally be honest. I’m sorry.” 

Silence. She hated silence. Especially when it was uncomfortable. He still hadn’t said anything but she saw the wheels turning in his head. She watched as his eyes darted from left to right, a sign that he was running through a series of logical thoughts--a million a minute. She waited patiently for his response. 

“I felt rejected,” he said softly. “Like I was good for that moment where you let loose but then after that…” 

Anvika sighed heavily. The  conversation was going deeper than she anticipated. 

Lewis dropped his hand from her thigh and brought it to his face, rubbing softly. “When you care for someone all you want to do is be there for them. To be someone that gives them the love, honor, and respect they deserve. I’ve seen how these situations have broken you down and ruined your self-esteem and trust in men, and yet, deep down even while simply being a friend, all I wanted to do was love you and show you differently. So when that happened…what I thought was placed in my grasp was taken just as quickly as it was given. And I would think, is the thought of being with me that bad? That does something to a person, Ani.” 

There was a strain in voice as he asked her what he’d been thinking for weeks. Her confessions gave more insight on why she acted the way she did, but just as she said, it didn’t change the fact that he was hurting. But, to lay his heart on the table the way he wanted with her awaiting ears was relieving. Maybe they would get somewhere.

“I know, darling, and I am sorry,” she said quickly between his words, but quickly retreated so he could continue. “Keep going…” 

“I can’t make you love me the way I love you, I can’t make you mean it in the way that I do, and I can’t make you want something more with me,” he said truthfully though the thought pained him. “So if friends is what keeps you in my life then--”

“I want to try,” Anvika cut him off. His eyes cut to her. His heart began to pound in his chest. “I was told that your lover should be your friend. I’ve experienced you as my friend for six years and I’m starting to understand that it’s okay for those lines to blur, but I only want that with you. If you’ll still have me.” Though her words ceased, her eyes, filled with tears, pleaded with him. Lewis exhaled.

You, my love, are a gem.

+

At that moment, Anvika understood why people made love often. She wasn’t a very sexual person, opting for other forms of intimacy to deepen her relationship with her partner. But when it came to Lewis, she knew he would have her addicted and yearning for more. 

He was so attentive to the needs of her body and gentle in executing them. He was patient, knowing he was the first man she’d been with in four years and that alone made her desire for him grow greater. 

Each graze of his lips against her jaw, sensual caress of her chest, and deep thrust had her singing his name. It was the sweetest song he’d heard. 

Lewis made love to her slowly, just as she requested. 

“Can you go slow, please?” Her voice was hardly above a whisper. 

“Whatever you want, baby.”

He was used to things moving fast, but he was willing to slow down as much as necessary. Plus, it gave him the opportunity to take in every face she made as he dug deep into her. 

Anvika was pressed against him, her legs trembling around his waist as he guided her movements. Her head was thrown back as she succumbed to the pleasure she’d been without for so long. Her jaw hung as a string of profanities fell. Lewis couldn’t help but chuckle. “Feel good, baby?” 

Anvika let out a breathy whine as her body grew warmer and warmer. The whine turned into a sharp gasp when Lewis’ tattooed hand slithered around her neck and squeezed. “Lewis.” His action made her jerk against him. 

“I asked you a question, beloved,” he whispered against her jaw, peppering kisses along her damp skin. 

Anvika nodded, “Yes! So good.” Lewis turned her head and brought his mouth to hers—a heated exchange of moans and passion transferred from one to another. “I love you.” The words fell from her lips as she reached her peak.

To be loved. Against her skin, he whispered back, “I love you.”

+

The water felt amazing against her skin as she stood beneath the rainfall-like water head. It soaked her once pressed hair, causing it to shrink and revert to its natural state. When Anvika wiped the water from her race, she saw Lewis staring at her, eyes full of love with hints of lust.

“What?” she asked innocently, welcoming the forthcoming feeling of his hands at her hips. 

“You’re pretty,” he said simply. He swirled a strand of her hair around his finger and watched as it recoiled. Her big eyes followed his movement. “Very pretty.”

Anvika smiled like a school-girl who found out her crush liked her back. “You are, too.” She pecked his lips and prepared to turn toward the water again but was halted by Lewis pressing her against the wall, hiking her leg up, and capturing her lips in a soul-snatching kiss. 

She whimpered and tossed her arms around his shoulders. His hand slid between them, his fingers dancing along her most sensitive place, working her up. “Can I?” His arousal nudged her thigh, desperate to get a release in her warmth. 

“Yes…”

+

They ordered takeout and ate comfortably on her bed whilst Sex in the City played on the television in the background. They were bare as the day they were born, but it didn’t spark the same excitement as it did just hours before. It felt natural and domestic. 

Anvika sat on his lap, eyes fixed on the television screen as he fed her their shared vegan pasta. The sounds of her heavy chewing made him laugh. “Is it good?” She hummed.

“You’re the only person that could convince me to eat vegan food.”

Lewis shrugged with a lazy smile, claiming for himself what she did not take off the fork. “Because I’m magical.” 

Anvika giggled and nodded, pressing her lips against his. “You are, darling, and I love you because of it.” 

Lewis wouldn’t get used to hearing that. What scared her before came so naturally in the moment and he was so thankful that it did. He finally got what he wanted and he’d never let her go. 

He smiled and it finally reached his eyes, “I love you more.”

And it was so.

[sp0-t]

Preview of some upcoming stories?!! (sort of rambles)

SIMON “GHOST” RILEY

You and Simon used to date, it was a while ago, 5 years, 7 months, 2 weeks, and 3 days ago to be exact. You never kept count, you wanted to forget everything. It was Simon that kept count, every second, every minute, every hour. He was there keeping track. You moved on, you had a whole new life at this point, new job, new house, new car, even a new partner. You wanted nothing to do with that old life that old place, that old job still haunting you some nights. But that was all behind you, long ago, no reason to dwell on it, you have a new life a new start that not many got. Your old life was behind you forgotten, like a bad dream.

Except this dream came back to haunt you, physically, in the present. In the physical form of Simon “Ghost” Riley. He was the reason you couldn’t sleep at night, the reason you needed a new life in the first place, needed to run away from the past.

Him

HIM

The last person that deserved to come back into your life was here. And he is persistent per usual, no matter what you do, or what you say to him, he was not going to budge he’d stay stolid and still and he’d be that way for the rest of time if he had to.

He’d wait…

KYLE “GAZ” GARRICK

Gaz and you are two of the biggest names in the modeling world. You can’t talk about it without either name popping up. What makes it even more of popular topic, is the rumor of a certain type of relationship between you two. However these aren’t true they can’t be, at least not yet…

You are in a contract with one of if not the biggest modeling agency in the world, you being their top model, however, you have a very close runner up. They’ve been gaining more and more attraction every year, placing them higher and higher in the rankings. Social media isn’t helping in this case, it’s the very thing that gained them their popularity in the first place. One post about their new male model and the internet goes fucking batshit.

“Who is he?”

“I need him!”

“He’s so fine, omg!”

“The things I would do…”

Well, who is this mystery man, no other than Kyle Garrick. He normally goes by his stage nickname “Gaz”. No one knows where it comes from, but then again no one really cares enough.

However this year both your agency’s are competing for first, both agencies have to put out their best models in a runway show, a panel will then decide who the best is. But then why do people suspect a relationship between the two. A simple cigarette, that was it, a cigarette. Paparazzi can be some nosey individuals, it was after a clothes fitting, both agencies were required to have it done by the same tailor company to remove any bias, and no changes could be made to outfits by this point. It was late out probably 11pm, about to be 12. I guess paparazzi doesn’t sleep, you went out for a cigarette or two. About to light your second you hear the door open behind you.

“Mind if I join you?”

Of course it was him, why wouldn’t it be Gaz

“Do as you please.”

Your voice comes out a bit muffled from the cigarette between your lips. You try and light your cigarette again, you spark the lighter multiple times no flames ever coming to light. You get more and more frustrated the longer it takes to see flames. You bring the thing up to your ear and shake to hear if there’s any liquid, it’s empty. In frustration you throw the lighter against a nearby wall.

“Fucking piece of shit.”

Still muffled from the unlit cigarette you sigh out in frustration and defeat, leaning against the wall behind you. You run your hand through your hair as your about to push off the wall to walk back inside the building, when a flame is placed in front of you.

“Need a light?”

You look up at him a bit confused

“Yeah. Thanks.”

SNAP* SNAP* SNAP* The image of Gaz leaning over slightly cupping the flame to prevent the wind from blowing it out, while you tilt your head a bit up to get your cigarette to reach the flame while Gaz looks down at you. That’s what was going viral, the image, the circulating stories and rumors going around. Both of your names were everywhere, one couldn’t be without the other in the media.

All over a damn cig

💿: I only have two for you today, these are just quick summaries. I’m sorry these are on like “cliff hangers”, I really wanted you guys to make your own assumptions and theories. I do want to start writing an actual full on story for one of the quick ideas I’ve wrote(author!price, PoliceForce!141, and these new ones). I’ll most likely put up a poll for people to vote on which one I’ll write first, so definitely stay around for that if you’re interested!!

(sorry the Simon one is so short but if I added more it would be like double this whole page)

written by: @sp0-t ©️

[dancinglikebutterflywings]

12 Days of Christmas + Ace's B-Day | Masterlist

I wasn't planning to do anything for Christmas but I wanted to do something for my birthday (it's Dec 26th). I couldn't think of what to do so I decided just to mix 12 Days of Christmas and my birthday together. And since it'll be my birthday I'll make it for my bias'.

Requests Info & Prompts

Main Masterlist | Tag List Form

IMAGINES:

DAY 01: Christmas Cookies (Dad!Hongjoong x Mum!Reader) - Making christmas cookies with the family doesn't go to plan.

DAY 02: Snow Storm (Jung Wooyoung x Reader) - Prompt 2: there's a snowstorm that prevents Y/N from going home for Christmas. She thinks she's the only one who wasn't able to make it home but is surprised to see that her cute neighbour is also there.

DAY 03: Snow Angels (Dad!Choi Seungcheol x Mum!Reader) - Prompt 10. Reader and Idol taking their kids outside to make snowmen and snow angels

DAY 04: Min Yoongi x Staff!Reader - Requested by Anon - Prompt 9: Reader is assigned Idol for secret Santa at the company Christmas party. Little does she know idol also got her.

DAY 05: Kim Hongjoong x Reader - Requested by @arki-sha - Hongjoong invites reader to spend christmas with him and his friends, knowing she'll be alone.

DAY 06: Yoon Jeonghan x Ex!Reader - Requested by Anon - Prompt 5: Y/N is told her ex won't be at a mutual friends christmas party, but it's a lie in an attempt to get the couple back together.

DAY 07: Kim Hongjoong x Reader - requested by Anon - Prompt 8: Reader and Idol decide to do a little something different for their gifts to each other. Instead of buying them, they're going to make them.

DAY 08: Jung Wooyoung x Reader - Requested by Anon - Christmas is readers favorite time of year and Wooyoung has been planning for months to finally make the perfect confession.

DAY 09: Husband!Min Yoongi x Wife!Reader - Requested by Anon - Prompt 11. Reader finds out her parents have made a last minute decision to come to her for Christmas, causing her to become an overwhelmed mess as she tries to put on the perfect Christmas for them. Luckily she has her husband to help and keep her calm.

DAY 10: Choi Seungcheol x Reader - Requested by @staytiny2000 - Prompt 7. Reader's December birthday is always overshadowed by Christmas. Idol makes sure reader knows her birthday is just as important, if not more.

DAY 11: Yoon Jeonghan x Reader - Requested by Anon - Prompt 1. It being reader and idol's first christmas living together, they decide to go christmas tree shopping together.

DAY 12: Choi Seungcheol x Reader - Poll's choice - Reader's last minute flight home on Christmas Eve gets canceled because of bad weather. Now reader is stuck in an airport spending christmas eve night and possibly christmas with a bunch of strangers. Among those strangers is (insert idol 's name).

(BONUS) DAY 13: Min Yoongi x Reader - A self indulgent birthday fic. - Yoongi doesn't think Reader should spend her birthday alone.

©️2024 dancinglikebutterflywings - Do not copy. modify and/or repost anywhere.

[chipified]

Avatar hcs

Spoilers for the reckoning of Roku, the kyoshi novels and the yangchen novels. Note I still need to finish Rokus and kyoshi's books

Korra

• Korra has broken her fingers many, many times

• Her eyes are so bright and eye-catching. People stare at them a lot.

• She could pull so easily. She's great at flirting (usually) But she doesn't because she's loyal to asami

• Sure she was showing growth when she spared kuvira but she does NOT like her. Kuvira pisses her off

• Luckily she's able to make up for her lack of experience in the real world with how social she is but she is clueless about slang and she never understands references

• Jokes fly right over her head

• All of the krew has such a shitty sense of humour they laugh at the dumbest things

• Goes through like 12 hairstyle phases. She loves mixing it up

• Stubborn as hell she stood by the spirit portal decision for he entire life and death

• A really talented bender. In her spare time she attempts to recreate the feats of her past lives

• Bias towards kuruk. She thinks he looked very cool and admired his skills

Aang

• Being vegetarian spared him from the knowledge that he is allergic to shellfish

• Sokka and toph teased him about his first flirting attempts on katara until the day he died

• His death was really unexpected. He was mostly fine leading up to it. Noone could really figure out what killed him at first, it was ultimately just him overworking himself too much

• Not a fan of the spirit world. He avoids it where he can

• Koh the face stealer scared him senseless actually no matter what he says

• He was always really busy with his duties but he did try to spend as much time with his children as he could

• Was super doting on katara while she was pregnant

• Tried a long bearded look for a while. It looked awful and toph clowned on him so hard. So did his kids

• Admired Yangchen and Roku so much. Kyoshi freaked him out as a kid

Roku

• Those first few months of travelling with the air nomads sucked ass. He was constantly covered in mud, his hair was knotted and he STANK oh my god he missed home so bad

• Actually pretty clumsy. Even when he was old he would trip over his own feet all the time. Dislocated his hip once

• A pushover. Sozin would take his snacks and drag him places as small children and he'd just take it

• Sozin had no faith in his avatarhood

• Politics were a nightmare for him in his late teens and twenties because of how awkward he was. He grew into his own though and ended up decently good at negotiating.

• Has freckles, but they only show up at the height of summer

• He doesn't tan he goes red

• Low self esteem, he thinks everything he does is embarrassing

• Collected seashells. Both because he wanted to try and get reacquainted with the ocean and because he thought they were pretty

• Shortly after Yasu died, he was so petrified of water he could barely bathe. He was very traumatised for a long while

• His own safety wasn't much of a priority. Guilt consumed him, so he didn't care what happened to him, as long as the people he was close to were safe

Kyoshi

• Thank god for airbending because she is intensely affected by the cold

• Her Hands are always slightly shaky, so applying her makeup can be so annoying sometimes

• Politics bored her to death

• Queen of “this could've been an email”

Uses her height to her advantage as much as she can. It's just easier and leads to less violence

• Very kind to young children

• She doesn't mean to be harsh or rude, she's just very blunt and has a flat tone

• She got very sick very easily as a kid. If kelsang hadn't found her she probably wouldn't have lived much longer

• Insecure about her appearance. Rangi spent years convincing her she wasn't ugly

• She saw a lot of her younger self in Roku. It made her uncomfortable

Kuruk

• Hopeless romantic. Loves poetry, songwriting and those partner dances. You know damn well he took ummi on as many dates as he possibly could

• Self reliant. Asking for help with anything becomes harder and harder as he grows older (“older”). Even basic stuff like asking someone to help him carry stuff

• His parents were disappointed in him. In their eyes they raised the only avatar in recent history who just didn't do his job

• They both outlived him

• He was fantastic at bending though, he could pull of some tricks that not even his teachers could

• He should've been at the club bro!! House parties would've been his shit!! He would've eaten at karaoke

• As much as he drank he still despised the taste of vodka

• Wanted to be a father. But that didn't work out

• Trust issues

Yangchen

• Her hair started going grey pretty early into her life. She was crazy stressed

• Rip yangchen you would've loved weed

• She did not celebrate the day Chaisee died because that would be disrespectful. So kavik did it for her amen

• Really enjoyed sports. Would've killed it at baseball

• She doesn't like watching the lives of the future avatars until they hit like 25 they stress her out so hard when they're young

• One of the few team avatars to stick together for life and not retire at any point. All of them worked until they were forced to stop

• Infertile

• Tries to visit her sister in the spirit fog sometimes but can't bring herself to go in again. She stops doing this eventually

• Kavik cuts her hair. He's weirdly good at it. In return she brings him trinkets she finds in all the places she visits

• Yingsu and her have spa days together

• Her sanity was hanging on by a thread during Legacy. She was so close to crashing out

• The past lives “possessing” her was an issue her whole life, exacerbated in times of stress. Neither she or her past lives could control it. It just happened when it happened

Wan

• Realistically he knew that he couldn't just fix all the world's problems in his lifetime alone, but god he did not want to die the way he did. He really wanted a peaceful death

• The armour he was wearing when he died was slowly gathered up over the years from battlefields and things he just found on the ground

• His avatar state was slightly different from his incarnations. Since it wasn't something he was born with, it caused some issues. For example, his vision was very poor when he died

• Felt really bad about the impact he had on the other avatars lives.

• Super bored all the time. He's seen everything there is to see at this point

• Wan and raava are super comfortable they know literally everything about each other

• Never had a lover. It just didn't interest him at all. The following avatar just ended up looking similarly to him (Alternatively- he had a bad breakup with a guy and that is why none of the future avatars date men/j)

• Wan and Jaya (his friend that died fighting spirits) built the treehouse they lived in together. Yao (tree-sprit guy) met them a little later. They formed their own little family after being shunned by everyone else

• Yangchens life was his favourite to watch. Aang's life was his least favourite.

• Korra was the only one he went out of his way to speak to. He hasn't been summoned for at least a few thousand years and he just prefers to let them make their own decisions

[061306]

␥ list of things i’ve successfully manifested !

i discovered manifestation and the law around early 2022 and here's what i have manifested since then! this might not be much but this is to remind me that i am capable of anything and everything!

𖥻 1. clearer skin

i used to have a terrible breakout on the right side of my face + oily skin. now my skin is much better and less oily! i do not have acne anymore.

𖥻 2. weight loss ( 14 kgs )

i went from 69 kgs to 55 kgs in around two months with minimal exercise ( walking ) & a simple diet.

𖥻 3. height increase ( 11cm )

i used to be 150cm but not anymore lol. i got better proportions too!

𖥻 4. text messages & instant replies from people.

i also manifested message from a friend i was no longer in contact with.

𖥻 5. passing exams i thought i was going to fail

accountancy was my weakest subject but i manifested passing several tests and exams. i also manifested getting better in it!

𖥻 6. getting above average % board exams

board examinations are a big deal in my country and i, unfortunately, ended in a stream i was not interested in. i manifested getting ~80% in them despite getting way lesser in school examinations.

𖥻 7. food

one single thought turned into an assumption and i am having whatever i want for dinner!

𖥻 8. storage of my phone increasing

i only have 32gb of storage in my phone lol. so sometimes i have to clear app caches to make space, but not anymore.

𖥻 9. love confession

i simply wanted a love confession and i got it. as easy as it gets.

𖥻 10. an increament in my mom’s salary & money for myself

my mom really wanted an increament and i manifested it! she got increament of 5.5k! also manifested a bonus for her. + got gift money from my parents and relatives!

𖥻 11. letting go of & detaching from several people

i used to be attached some people that hurt me but not anymore. i have let go of them and it feels so much better.

𖥻 12. books & manga ( jjk )

my mom is not the type to let me spend money on buying books ( for leisure reading ), much less a comic book. but i manifested her allowing me to buy 4 books + 1 manga volume! she even paid for them.

𖥻 13. delaying the start of my college, teachers & professors taking leaves, not getting scolded for submitting assignments late

my college was supposed to start from early june but i manifested a delay and it started from mid-july. i have manifested both school teachers and college professors taking leaves on my desired days.

𖥻 14. nice aura + compliments

i have a magnetic aura, people feel comfort around me and i get so many compliments about literally everything i do!

𖥻 15. quick deliveries of my orders

🤭🤭🤭

𖥻 16. winning an elocution competition

i was really worried because i only found about it a day before and some other contestants had been trained by their professors. i was full of nerves but still won the first rank! the judges said my content was unique and everything i did was perfect.

𖥻 17. kitten type beauty

manifested myself big upturned eyes with pretty lashes & a v-shaped face with smooth skin!

𖥻 18. cats loving me

call me a cat whisperer the way cats love me! i can easily befriend any cat!!! ˃ᴗ˂

𖥻 19. desired skincare products for cheap

i really wanted vitamin c serum and face cleanser and sometime later i saw an ad with an offer to get both for 1 rupee! crazy right?

𖥻 20. entering the void on several occasions.

i have entered the void several times albeit unaware. recently i've started becoming aware before snapping out of it!

masterlist. | notes – i've also manifested getting a merch of my bias. i got it from my best friend as gift but i didn't add it on the list because i didn't want break the perfect 20. also this list is as on 04 DEC 2023.

[kpopcreators]

KPOP CREATORS EVENT 04: 30 DAYS OF KPOP

join us for event #4: 30 days of k-pop, where we celebrate our favorite groups, idols, and moments through a month-long gif-making challenge! each day, create and share a gif set based on the daily prompt. it’s a great way to show off your creativity, connect with fellow kpop fans, and relive iconic moments together!

how to participate:

reblog this post to spread the word!

join our discord server to share your creations, connect with other participants, and get updates throughout the event.

daily prompts:

9/14: day 1: introduction to the group - start with an introductory gif set that showcases the group’s members, concept, etc. 9/15: day 2: pre-debut - highlight a pre-debut performance, practice, or moment. 9/16: day 3: debut stage - gif your favorite group or idol’s debut stage. 9/17: day 4: leader - focus on the group’s leader, showcasing their leadership qualities 9/18: day 5: bias - highlight your bias with a gif set that captures their essence. 9/19: day 6: bias wrecker - gif the member who often challenges your bias spot. 9/20: day 7: favorite friendships - showcase a gif set of your favorite friendships within the group or with other idols.

9/21: day 8: best hair color - show the best hair color on your bias or another member. 9/22: day 9: best mv - gif what you consider the best music video in terms of aesthetics, concept, or execution. 9/23: day 10: first win - celebrate the group’s first music show win with a gif set. 9/24: day 11: favorite performance - showcase your favorite performance by the group, whether it’s a live stage, award show, or concert. 9/25: day 12: favorite fancam - gif an iconic fancam that you love, highlighting the idol’s stage presence or unique performance style. 9/26: day 13: funniest moments - gif some of the funniest or most memorable moments. 9/27: day 14: legendary comeback - focus on a comeback that you consider legendary, either for its impact, concept, or success.

9/28: day 15: best era - highlight what you believe to be the best era of the group, showcasing performances, mvs, or photoshoots from that time. 9/29: day 16: subunit/solo - gif a subunit or solo project from one of the members, showing their versatility and talent. 9/30: day 17: best outfits - highlight a stage or mv with the best outfits that the group or member has worn. 10/01: day 18: favorite choreography - gif your favorite choreography or dance move from a performance or mv. 10/02: day 19: photoshoot - showcase a favorite photoshoot or magazine spread featuring the group or a member. 10/03: day 20: maknae line - focus on the youngest members of the group, highlighting their charm and growth. 10/04: day 21: most underrated - gif a member, performance, or song you think is underrated and deserves more recognition.

10/05: day 22: underrated mv - highlight an underrated mv by the group that you think deserves more attention. 10/06: day 23: group dynamics - show the dynamic between the members in a fun or touching moment. 10/07: day 24: special stage/collab - highlight a special stage or collaboration between idols from different groups. 10/08: day 25: pets - showcase cute moments of idols with their pets. 10/09: day 26: rap line - showcase your favorite rap line. 10/10: day 27: casual/behind-the-scenes - gif a casual or behind-the-scenes moment that shows a different side of the idols. 10/11: day 28: concert - highlight a moment from a live concert that captures the energy of the event.

10/12: day 29: ending fairies - capture the perfect "ending fairy" moment from a performance. 10/13: day 30: free choice - choose any moment, performance, or aspect of the group to create a gif set.

happy giffing! ✨

[misscammiedawn]

Gender, Dissociation and Clinical Stigma - The Third Person

Before I begin I just want to note that typically Media, Myself and I entries are aimed at depictions of dissociative disorders in popular fiction. Today's entry is a graphic novel memoir by a transgender woman with dissociative identity disorder. As it's both not in the public zeitgeist and good representation by virtue of being lived experience of someone who struggled within the mental healthcare system I want to recommend people buy the book (or check it out of their local library). I fully support the artist and want to prop up something good and beautiful.

With that said, let's begin...

CW: therapy abuse

With all the recent hysteria in the US and UK media over transgender healthcare it can be easy to forget the hurdles we all have to climb to receive care. Though Informed Consent is becoming more of a standard practice these days the DSM-5 Criteria for Gender Dysphoria indicates a 6 month requirement for observation before HRT can be prescribed. Many of us needed to jump the hoops of living 6-12 months "in the gender role that is congruent with their gender identity" before we were allowed to begin our gender journey in earnest.

Of course. This requires a clinician (or two for surgical options) to observe this, monitor it and sign off on it. But therapists are humans and are full of prejudice, bias and their own beliefs. They aren't guaranteed to think it is medically necessary or positive for a person seeking gender affirming care to receive it.

So where does DID fit into this picture?

A study, published in 2015, states clearly that 30% of transgender individuals met the criteria for a dissociative disorder.

Yet even still, The World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH), the gold standard for transgender care included this warning in their Standards of Care up until September 2022.

(source)

Fortunately that passage is no longer included in WPATH guidelines as of the 8th revision released in 2022. I shall say the above passage did grant a scare for us, though, as it was very much the practice when we were going for our surgery.

Standards of Care improve and medical understandings of both gender and dissociative care are becoming kinder towards clients.

Even still. There's always that fear. That months of therapy could be wasted on a clinician who was never going to sign off on HRT and was never going to believe our lived experience as a system.

We wouldn't have gotten nearly half as far as we have gotten without our therapist helping us identify our condition, manage our symptoms and develop cooperation and communication.

It's terrifying to think what life would be like if our symptoms not only went unmanaged, but we were made to feel fake and attention seeking by the very person we paid to take care of us...

-

With that intro in mind, The Third Person by Emma Grove is a memoir told in graphic novel format over 920 pages covering the period of life where she began therapy in hopes of receiving feminizing HRT not realizing she had an undiagnosed case of dissociative identity disorder.

When one opens the book they will see an Author's Note declaring that every word in the book is as accurate as Emma's memory will allow and any edits are to streamline the story, not to tailor anything to match the author's point of view and there is a dedication:

"For Katina - We finally did one together"

The story proper begins in media res Winter 2004, as Emma asks her therapist if he would like to hear about the book she was reading and the therapist responds asking why the client decided to speak with him "as Emma" today. Emma, confused, does not understand the question and is probed about her parts, about Ed and Katina and about her childhood. That last word being enough to cause Emma to freeze up, dissociate and...

This simple intro gives us all the context a reader needs to understand the antagonistic dynamic between Toby, the therapist, and his patient(s). Both client and patient are unable to understand the other and harbor suspicions about the other's intentions.

Without the context we only know Emma had a book, she no longer has a book and she suspects her therapist of being a mean person who is playing tricks on her.

We will get context later.

The first chapter of the book provides an introduction to the author's late teens and early 20s where they explore their gender identity and have their first experiences with their masked dissociative disorder.

The book goes to lengths to show the stress of the author dividing themselves between having to present male in their public life and sneaking out to bars where they can wear make-up, wigs and outfits to present female.

They take on their legal name, Ed, during their public life and when going out to clubs take the name Katina, from the first bar they visited presenting femme. The name Emma comes later when the system is working to transition into living as a woman in all aspects of their shared life.

The book patiently explores the stress of having to divide ones own self for their safety in spaces where they cannot present their truth without threat from an intolerant society. If 30% of transgender people suffer from dissociative disorders then a much higher number of them know the stress of having to compartmentalize themselves into different presentations for different audiences.

For us, we know that pain all too well. Our birth identity remains with us as a member of our own system. Less a ghost of our past and more a remnant of a mask we constructed to perform the version of self required for our safety.

The artwork does a good job of displaying switches and co-consciousness with subtle expression work, the hair style/wigs that each alter favors. For example we have the left displaying co-consciousness and a switch.

As the years go on, Katina finds ways to go out to the club and exist in her comfort and Ed labors hard to ensure that they can live for the times they get to "become" themselves.

Katina is established to be a fierce personality who will get aggressive when people push against her. She loves to dance and sing and party at the club. She is both a free spirit without inhibition and a fierce protector who will keep the system safe.

I recall feeling a deep fondness and connection towards Katina when we first read the book.

Once the narrative has firmly established the history that lead to the system seeking HRT we are brought into the meat of the book. A white void with a sofa and an armchair. The therapist's office where Katina, Emma and Ed speak with Toby.

Toby is a trans man that Katina believes to be an ally who will sign off on their HRT once the prerequisite 3 month waiting period is over. Unfortunately over the course of those months Toby becomes aware of Emma and Katina's switches and is convinced that it would be unethical for him to sign off on HRT when it is possible that there may be another 'guy part' in there who will 'wake up' one day and decide that he did not want to transition.

To his credit, once Toby suspects a dissociative disorder he does offer Emma a referral to a specialist. They do not take it as they just want to be signed off for HRT and have no interest in exploring their situation beyond transitioning. So they stick with Toby, convinced that another transgender individual will support them.

Toby, however, sticks to his guns and refuses to agree until they manage the DID.

In the opening, sampled above, Emma switches out at the mere mention of her childhood. Here we find that Katina will front any time Emma is made to think about her past and she refuses to allow Toby to force her to think about it or discuss it. She goes as far as to demand Toby promise not to push which, again, Toby refuses.

During this conflict both sides have exaggerated gestures of frustration, many exclamation points and underlined words. This is not a healthy dialogue at all. Toby is refusing to find middle ground or guide the therapy towards its intended destination. He denies all Katina's attempts to negotiate around the need to talk about her childhood (something she is convinced at this point has nothing to do with her stated goal of HRT) and continuously pushes that she needs to talk about it, without elaborating as to why.

Toby, untrained in dissociative disorders, is focused on getting her to open up about her childhood trauma. Katina, uninterested in exploring trauma, wants to be signed off for HRT. Neither side is willing to budge.

This isn't therapy. This is an argument.

Recently I wrote a Tumblr post about the "Hair Dryer Incident"

The Hair Dryer Incident is a story about a patient with OCD whose life was being massively disrupted by the fear that they had left their hair dryer plugged in at home and it would burn their house down. The clinician advised them to take the hair dryer to work with them every day so that they could see the hair dryer with them and not have to drive home to ensure it was safely unplugged.

There was debate in medical circles about whether this was "enabling" because it did nothing to treat the illness, only managed the life disrupting symptom of needing to drive home to check that the dryer was not plugged in.

For Toby in this scenario he believes that allowing Emma to transition would be "enabling" the sickness that he perceives, that being dissociative identity disorder. He has brought his own baggage into the office and only views Emma and Katina as parts of Ed. No amount of Emma and Katina self-advocating in his eyes will change his mind because they are not "real" in his view.

Of course, he is not fully sold on Emma's condition being real either. There is a sequence in which Emma is left alone in the room and she, having a fascination with books, checks out Toby's bookshelf. This causes Toby to become suspicious and decide that Emma has been reading the medical textbooks on dissociative disorders in order to fake an illness and trick him.

This is not a healthy therapeutic alliance and Toby is breaking all 3 key pillars of establishing a strong patient/client partnership.

Much of modern therapy techniques are based on the concept of Therapeutic Alliance. The history of which dates back to Sigmund Freud and the concept of transference but was refined and redefined by Carl Rogers in the modern Patient Centered Therapy (sometimes referred to as Rogerian Therapy).

With that in mind let's examine the 3 key elements of successful PCT(*) and how Toby failed.

Lead with a Patient Centered Approach This means to check all baggage at the door. Cultural biases have no room inside the clinic (during the book Toby openly mocks Emma's faith in God) and that the patient's priorities are the ones that should be focused on. Both client and clinician should be on the same page of what treatment is being sought, what goals are and how they will be achieved. Toby and Emma (or Katina and Ed) never establish this agreement during their time together. Katina/Emma/Ed are firm in their desire to transition and Toby is firm on his refusal to allow this until the DID is addressed.

Set clear goals with a treatment plan. A good treatment plan will have dates, targets and regular review and reward honesty for both/all parties involved in the alliance. Toby is telling Emma and Katina that they need to open up about their childhood but does not explain how this will benefit or what their goals are. Simply "it's good to talk about it" with no direction or assurances.

Regularly review satisfaction with the therapeutic process, relationship, and treatment plan. This element states that it is important that the clinician be upfront with any potential misdiagnosis and discuss any skepticism in the process and lead from a position of patient satisfaction. I do not need to highlight how Toby failed to lead from a position of patient satisfaction here.

Clearly Toby has a personal concept of what the correct approach is and is holding Emma/Katina's gender affirming care hostage until they can satisfy his unspoken objectives. Correctly applied PCT should be a discussion of mutual agreement and achievable goals worked over a period of time. Toby is not applying these principals at all. His modality simply seems to be "talk about it." I'll be an ethical writer who discloses their biases and say I despise PCT/Rogerian therapy. It is, however, the leading modality within western therapy and it is well researched. Not to mention it is the modality Toby appears to be utilizing in the book. I firmly disagree with Freud on all things (except the concept of infant experiences have lifelong ramifications. A broken clock is right twice a day) and disagree with Rogers on the idea that the client has all of the answers and needs to get out of their own way. An issue with this is that DID is a covert disorder and it will do everything it can to stay hidden. PCT does not offer an environment where patients will be able to navigate their condition as unless they are aware of their symptoms, how and when they manifest and are open to discussing those facts they will naturally steer away from circumstances that would lead to a diagnosis. Most people, including myself, have to exist in the mental healthcare system for 5-12 years before being correctly diagnosed with DID(*) and will experience a number of incorrect diagnoses before finding appropriate care. For us it was 9 years and 7 diagnoses. So. Toby's directive is that the system needs to get to the root of the condition and neither Katina nor Emma are willing to open up about their childhood. Katina continues sticking to her guns and refuses but Emma, desperate to start her medical transition, agrees to open up and the two form a shaky alliance where week by week the pair go back and forth between alliance and conflict. In time Emma describes her childhood being raised by her grandfather who was physically abusive towards her. All too quickly Katina's fears are justified by Toby's combative approach to patient care. One session Emma demands to know why she cannot work on her DID while she transitions and Toby states firmly that she is "not transsexual" which triggers Emma to dissociate into a black void that no one can reach her within. She wanted to be seen and regarded as a woman and a trans man told her flat out that he cannot and does not see her as such. Going back to the hair dryer incident as a reference for a moment. Ed is a member of the system and does show up for therapy on some days. At a point Katina, fed up with being denied treatment, makes a plan to quit their job and start a new life living as a woman 24/7. Ed creates a safety net to prevent this from ruining their collective life and continues to work in the meanwhile. Ed's role in the system has been ground down to working and working alone. He spends his days keeping so busy that he cannot dwell, a panel having the thought bubble "I can't slow down! If I slow down I have to think!" which is depressingly relatable to how we were in the worst years of repressing our gender identity. If Ed is unhappy living as a closeted man who has to occupy himself 24/7 to stop from caving in on himself, if Emma and Katina are both completely stunted by their inability to transition; is it ethical to allow them to transition and to work on their condition while allowing them the freedom to live openly as their chosen gender and prevent a circumstance that is harming the entire system? Toby seems to think it is enabling.

30% of the transgender individuals in the study above were observed to meet the criteria for a dissociative disorder. Living a life where one must mask has severe detrimental impacts on a person's psychology. This is true not just for transgender individuals but for those with autism (*) and other individuals on the LGBT spectrum (*) where the cognitive dissonance between who a person values themselves to be versus how they must present to the world causes the mind to dissociate further and allow contrary thinking to exist in individual pockets of a person's life as well as creates an alienation of the self. Healing under these circumstances requires accepting and embracing oneself, not creating a further divide.

After Toby "caught" Emma looking at the bookshelf he became convinced that she was faking her condition. That she had been plucking symptoms from a book and performing them for him. That she fit the criteria "too well"

Emma rightfully demands to know why she would complicate her receiving HRT by doing something that prevents her being able to. The pair bicker and Toby cuts off the session abruptly.

in the heat of the moment, assuming that Emma was an attention seeker who does not deserve care, Toby declares "Your grandfather was right to hit you."

Even Emma later admits later that therapy should have ended with Toby right there and then. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say. Alas, a mixture of finances and sunk cost keep Emma returning to the chair week after week.

Being trans and having DID are terrifying. In order to receive care and treatment we must insist to a world that what is happening in our hearts and minds is true in spite of all that the world outside tells us is true. We need to not only reach that conclusion within our own lives but must express that truth loud enough that the people around us see it, regard it and accept it.

As so many things in this world are, it's so hard to earn and so easily burned.

"You're faking it for attention" is such an easy sentence to fling at someone and in a therapeutic setting all things should lead to curiosity. Even if a person were faking, it's not normal and healthy behavior for someone to do that. Toby is displaying a complete lack of curiosity and compassion. He is framing himself as the victim in a potential deception from someone who is paying what little money they can put together to receive his care.

I hate Toby.

As the story continues, Emma and her system begrudgingly continue, flitting back and forth between a healthy and unhealthy dynamic with their therapist that shares a lot of similarities to abuse honeymoons. It is worth noting that as the book is a memior it will inevitably be painted with the author's personal view of past events because, as discussed in the Umineko article on recontextualized memories, a human mind cannot avoid applying present understandings to past experiences when recalling memory. This is seen in the book when we see things that Emma cannot possibly have witnessed, such as Toby's facial expression after she leaves the office.

This is not to throw shade at how Emma depicts her former therapist, as he was quite horrid to all 3 of them and quite obviously did more harm than good during their time together. I just wish to note that skewed perspectives are an inevitability. Even still. They do make some progress in talking about the situations. We come to learn of the system origins and how Katina was a friend to the young and lonely child they used to be and that their abusive childhood was centered around physical abuse from their grandfather. While discussing this Emma notes that she could make Katina go away forever with a single phrase. A few short words that she can never ever say and mean or Katina would go away and never come back... and I think that's where I'll stop with the synopsis. I (specifically me, Dawn) broke down in tears the first time I read the book and I have no will to put myself through that again at this exact moment and I wish for you all to have the catharsis of experiencing it for yourself.

I will say in way of positivity that the story is quick to make its conclusions in the final chapters by displaying therapy done right and the fact that even if parts can no longer be heard or even felt, they will always endure in moments where they can add a little color to the world.

They got to write this book together, after all.

For all the sadness this memoir elicits it speaks an honest and hard truth of the desperation, isolation and confusion that can be found in managing sentiments of identity and gender in a time when there was so little understanding and acceptance, particularly for transgender people.

We are lucky these days to have the internet as it is where we can create community and find our people and in finding our people have a better understanding of who we are and how we can live our truths. Visibility of transgender and plural populations has been increasing in part due to the fact we are able to feel unalone and forge community.

2004 did not have those luxuries and I am saddened that Emma Grove had to live through that stigma and lost so much time to unethical and prejudice care from a clinician.

I do hope that in the future we can continue accepting and encouraging one another and living lives where we are not forced to hide, mask or pretend.

-

For other Media, Myself and I articles, please check out the following:

[kpop-yes]

Ryujin x male reader: Fan Favorite

Ryujin POV

It's been a few months since a group i've been in, Itzy, Debuted.

And I'd be lying if I said it wasn't stressful, because it was very stressful.

We had a strict schedule and had to practice on a daily basis with barely any energy.

And one way people like to get rod of stress, is sex.

But it's hard being an idol and trying to have sex.

It either ends up being a creep or some lowlife cheating behind my back.

Speaking of my idol life, that reminds me that I have a fam meetup in a few hours.

I haven't really been interested in having sex with any of my fans, except for one.

He's always at every concert or fan meetup, and he's always at the front row, having a t-shirt or sign of me on it.

With all the times we've interacted, He's single and most definitely handsome~

Anyways I might take him to a hotel, to talk, and maybe a little more than that... Okay maybe sex.

-Timeskip-

After entering our venue and meeting with security and staff, It was time for my plan to take action.

I've made a little note with my hotel address and room number, Then if he does show up, I'll get to know him a bit, then if does seem to be a good guy, then this night could take lust turn.

Y/n POV

Another day, another Itzy fan show.

I decided to buy a little plushie to give to Ryujin, I hope she likes it.

Anyways, I better get going, the venue isn't far but I wanna get to my seat first before the venue gets crowded.

Ever since Itzy debuted, I've been in love with Ryujin, and she's been my bias ever since 2019 when they debuted.

- TimeSkip -

I arrived at the venue and sat down in my seat, noticing only that a couple people were here and they were taking pictures.

I looked up at the stage to see people setting up tables and chairs and getting everything set up.

That's when everyone rushed in and started taking their seats.

After a few minutes, Itzy walked and everyone started cheering, including me.

They were bowing and as soon as they were taking seats, I swear I saw her wink at me.

- Ryujin POV -

We all walked up to the front of the stage, bowed, and introduced ourselves to the fans, add as were walking to our seats, I spotted him, and I winked at him.

I felt so proud of myself for making the first move, hopefully he noticed.

Anyways, we sat down at our seats and explained how gifts and pictures worked, and after explaining some more rules, our fans started lining one by one for a signature and picture.

I looked to see where he was and saw that he was one of the first in line.

I got more nervous the more he moved closer, but why, if anything he should be the nervous one.

After taking a couple pictures and signing, It was his turn, what was his name again? was it y/n? might as well give it a shot.

He walked up to me and handed a little plushie,

"I hope you like it", he says.

"Like it? I love it! Thanks um... Y/n right?"

"Yes, you remembered my name!"

"How could I forget one of my biggest fans names! Anyways, Do you want a picture or an autograph?"

"Just a picture please!"

He handed me his phone and I took a photo of us, he looked very cute, but now it was time to give him the note.

- Y/n POV -

After taking a photo with Ryujin, I turned around and was about to walk off stage when I felt something in my hand.

I turned around to see Ryujin handing me a note,

The note said

-Meet me at (Random hotel address and room number) At 12:00 -

Is this really happening, has THE Ryujin invited me to her hotel room?!

I looked at her to see if this was some sort of joke but after looking deep in her sincere eyes, I don't think she's joking.

I nervously walked off the stage and back in my seat.

- Timeskip -

The rest of the fan meet was very awkward for me so much. I felt very awkward just looking at ryujin and couldn't focus on the fan meet and worried more about what she wanted from me.

Did she want to give me something? Was she going to do something to me? did she give me the correct hotel number?

So many thoughts and dirty thoughts running through my head the whole time.

I left instantly

when the fan meet ended and didn't look back.

I drove home, showered, and got ready to hopefully meet Ryujin at the hotel.

- Timeskip -

I left my house and got in my car, nervously I drove to the hotel address.

Never had I thought that I'd be driving to meet Ryujin at a hotel in private, One could only dream about this happening, but not me.

I arrived at the hotel, and it wasn't that big, Not I even I would suspect that an Idol was staying here.

I got out of my car and walked into the hotel, I asked the person at the desk where the room number Ryujin told me was at.

They gave me instructions and I was now taking an elevator to the room where Ryujin is supposedly at.

I got off the elevator and I found the room.

I nervously walked up to the door and knocked.

*Knock* *Knock*

Nothing, I guess she really did give me a random room number-

*click*

The door got unlocked, the door slowly opened and,

There she was, Ryujin, In front of me.

"Hey, you came! Come inside", she said.

"O-Okay".

I walked inside the room to see a bed, bathroom, and tv.

Nothing expensive just a normal room.

I sat down on the bed and Ryujin Closed the door and sat next to me.

"So, Why did you want me to meet you here?" I asked.

"Oh because I wanted to ask you some questions!"

And for the next 20 minutes Ryujin asked me questions like what I do on my free time and My hobbies.

Nothing seemed unusual until the final question.

"Anyways, I have one final question", she said while moving closer to me.

"Un sure, ask away".

She got closer to me until her face was right in front of me. She got closer to my ear and whispered,

"Are you a virgin Y/n?"

What, How am I supposed to answer that question?!?

If I say no she'll expect me to be experienced?  But if i say yes I'll probably look like a loser to her?

What do I say?!?

"Um, Y-Yeah Im a V-Virgin" I said nervously

"Perfect~ Take off your pants"

I did as she said and started unbuckling my pants.

But I guess I was taking too long because she got on her knees and started taking off my pants.

After struggling to unzip my pants, she roughly pulled them down and admired my member bulging through my boxers, then taking them off.

One thing I won't ever forget is the second when my member slapped a crossed face and her face admiring my member.

After admiring my member for a minute, she wraps her hands around my member and starts to stroke it.

I couldn’t stop myself from moaning.

The sensation was already amazing but knowing that Ryujin was stroking my dick the sensation was even better.

Going from stroking, Ryujin Puckered her lips as she slowly started to give me a blowjob.

Her tongue twisting in the inside of her mouth while moving her head back and forward was something that you could only imagine.

My head felt lightheaded snd I felt like I was about to blow my load.

I guess Ryujin could sense my load as she suddenly stopped what she was doing and stood up.

She looked me in the eyes while slowly stripping right in front of me.

After taking off most of her clothes, all that was left were her bra and her soaked panties.

She fell on the bed back first and seemingly waited for me.

“Come on, you’re taking too long. Woman also need some stress taken care of!” She said frustrated.

I moved on top of her and started moving her panties to the side snd admired her soaked Vagina.

But I guess I took too long because she wrapped her legs around me and pulled me in her grasp.

I lined ip my member to her pussy and slowly inserted my dick into her.

Her slow moans gave me more confidence to move more inside of her.

After being fully inside of her, I stroked back and forward slowly, Hearing her moans was a pleasant sound to hear.

My mind started to get foggy as I started to Stroke harder, My head felt dizzy but I kept stroking until I was about to reach my limit,

“Ah, Ryujin, I’m about to cum-“

“Do it, Do it Y/n, Fucking cum inside of me!”

After getting confirmation from Ryujin, I kept pounding until I blew my load inside of her.

I Laid beside her, Admiring her body.

Even tho I blew my load, My member was still rock hard.

Ryujin looked back at me and smirked.

And after what seemed like a looooong night, Ryujin gave me her number and told me,

“Call me if you ever fell stressed again”.

[minhypen]

Minyoung (ENHYPEN) Profile & Facts

Minyoung (민영) is a member of the Plus-One boy group ENHYPEN who debuted on November 30, 2020, under HYBE Entertainment.

Stage Name: Minyoung (민영) Birth Name: Park Min-Yeong (박민영) English Name: Madison Park Japanese Name: Arai Mizuki Position: Female Center, Sub-Leader, Main Dancer Birthday: December 23, 2003 Zodiac Sign: Capricorn Chinese Zodiac Sign: Sheep Height: 170 cm (5’6) Weight: N/A Blood Type: B MBTI Type: ESTJ (Her previous result was ESFJ) Nationality: Japanese Ethnicity: Korean Solo Fandom Name: Min-ions Representative Emoji: 🐰 Mic colour: Sparkly white

Minyoung Facts:

She was born in Osaka, but she studied in a Korean all-girls school rather than a Japanese one

She has two representative animals, cat because of her eyes and bunny because of her teeth. That's why she's sometimes called a 'cat-like bunny', but bunny is the more often used nickname

Minyoung's mom made her take English lessons, so she is somewhat fluent in English

She used to play for her school's badminton team and even won gold in some inter-school tournaments

She has the second shortest training period in her group, training for only 10 months excluding I-Land

Her nicknames/titles are Pradagirl because of their ambassadorship, Alive Barbie-doll because of her perfect visuals, Minnyang-ie because of her resemblance to a cat, given by her members and Maddy Hopps because of her resemblance to Judy Hopps from Zootopia, given by her fans

She is said to be someone born for the stage, because she seems her happiest when she's performing

She is very close with her sister, who came all the way to Seoul with her when she started her training (Minyoung's birthday live, 2021)

Being an ARMY since 2014, Minyoung picked BTS's RM as her biggest inspiration

She said she wants to learn how to play the drums and the guitar, if she ever has time

She used to be very popular in her school for being on the badminton team, so she always recieved chocolates from the girls in her grade on White Day

Minyoung's pet is a white ragdoll cat named Tsuki (I-Land ep. 12)

Her favorite color is white, but beige is a close second

She is known for her luck that always helps her at the right time. Her members gave her the name Golden Hands because she always picks the best option during a random draw

She has admitted that she's the worst at flirting among all the members

Sunghoon said that Minyoung likes to go out a lot and can easily make new friends, describing her as a perfect extrovert

She likes to read books in her free time and is a big fan of the Harry Potter series. She has a 3-foot bookshelf filled with novels and also has E-Book apps on her phone

Her childhood dream was to become like Tiana, who is her favorite Disney princess

She would like to try writing and composing songs for a change from her usual contribution of choreographing

Likes: sweets, Korean hot dogs, Disney, plushies, sports, the color white, Enhypen, Sunghoon (Self-Revised Profile)

Dislikes: coffee, carbonated drinks, bitter things, unorganized bed, bugs, needles, slimy things (Self-Revised Profile)

(Details as of December 2023)

Is Minyoung your Enhypen bias?

𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙩𝙤 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒 𝗛𝗢𝗠𝗘

© 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐇𝐘𝐏𝐄𝐍 　　(　　𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝖾𝗋𝗏𝖾𝖽　　) 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽𝗅𝗒 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝗎𝗅𝖾𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀

[girlactionfigure]

With the kindness of strangers, they were able to escape.

“They were taken in by strangers, even housed in a barn along the route of their escape.”

They were refugees, fleeing for their safety, fleeing for their lives, trying to find a new life.

The war-torn country they were living in had been invaded, and they knew they had to get out.

Fortunately, according to the National Endowment for the Humanities, the couple were able to obtain Brazilian passports.

Others trying to escape to the United States, like Anne Frank and her family never made it that far, according to the History Channel, hindered by “American bias against accepting . . . refugees”, which halted most immigration from Europe.

But, first they had to get out.

“On May 10, 1940, Adolf Hitler sent three million troops through the Low Countries into France, according to the Smithsonian. “Parisians fled by the hundreds of thousands before the Germans captured their city on June 14. Among them a young couple, German Jews who had been living in Paris for just four years. They had waited too long. There wasn’t a car or a bicycle left in the city. The husband bought every spare part he could find and built two bikes from scratch. At 5:30 on the morning of June 12, they rode out of Paris with a monkey hidden in the basket.”

Although the couple had previously owned two marmoset monkeys, they did not have an actual live monkey in their basket.

Writer Sarah Stewart Taylor explains further, after the couple got aboard the train:

Hans Reyersbach and his wife, Margarete Waldstein “tried to remain calm as the official came through the train car packed with refugees fleeing Nazi-occupied France and asked for identity papers. When the official saw the stacks of papers inside Hans’s bag, he became immediately suspicious.

“But when Hans . . . pulled out a manuscript for a children’s book entitled ‘The Adventures of Fifi’ . . . the official smiled and passed them by.

“Nearly a year later, after a harrowing wartime escape and journey to the United States”, the couple were able to publish their book “about a mischievous and curious monkey who was always getting into trouble.”

Immigrants Hans Reyersbach and his wife, Margarete Waldstein, used pen names and changed the monkey’s name. Their pen names were H. A. and Margret Rey and the monkey’s name was changed per their publisher to reflect a more American name. “Curious George” would become “one of the most popular children’s books of the 20th century.”

This is a new story for the Peace Page.

~~~~~

According to Taylor, “The Reys were living in Paris when World War II began on September 1, 1939. As news of the Nazis’ advance through Belgium and Holland reached Paris, the Reys began to accept that, as German Jews, they were in danger and would have to leave their adopted country. They were able to secure updated Brazilian passports and collect what they would need for the trip.”

“The Reys boarded a train for Spain in Orleans, France on June 14, 1940, the day the Nazis marched into Paris. On June 23, they arrived in Lisbon. Three months later, after a stay in Rio de Janeiro to secure visas, the Reys arrived in New York. They would live the rest of their lives in their adopted country.”

“The Reys were taken in by strangers, even housed in a barn along the route of their escape. They arrived in New York with almost no money, with their main luggage gone,” according to Rivka Galchen of The New Yorker.

“Little was publicly known about the Reys’ wartime experiences until a 2005 book, ‘The Journey That Saved Curious George,’ written by Louise Borden and illustrated by Allan Drummond. A journal entry of H. A. Rey’s from 1940 included in that book tells us something of Hans’s temperament: Work was going “very slowly on account of events,” he noted, of the week the Nazis breached the French border. A letter of intent to publish ‘Curious George’ from the English publisher Chatto & Windus specifies plans to publish the book barring any international ‘incident involving force majeur.’ And later, a 1944 New Year’s card written from New York reads, ‘Let us think of the future; that’s where we shall spend the rest of our lives.’”

~~~~~

“So far 75 million copies of the Curious George books have been sold worldwide in over a dozen languages,” according to writer Jeff MacGregor.

“You can find the day-to-day, even hour-by-hour notations of their escape in Hans’ meticulous notebooks, saved at the University of Southern Mississippi, in a collection that bears the couple’s pen names: H. A. and Margret Rey.”

“A series of lectures and programs sponsored by the Rey Center and the New Hampshire Humanities Council has put the Reys and their work in the larger context of American history and children’s literature, focusing on U.S. immigration policy,” according to the National Endowment for the Humanities.

“The Wartime Escape: Margret and H. A. Rey’s Journey from France” has attracted a lot of national attention, says Audrey Eisenhauer, executive director of the Rey Center. “This has opened it up to the world,” says Louise Borden of the exhibit. “It has let people know about these perilous times and made them imagine a world without Curious George.”

~ jsr

"Small acts of kindness can make a big difference in someone's life."

The Jon S. Randal Peace Page

[jae-bummer]

The Epitome of Okay

Request: can i get a christopher bang and #12. thank yooou!

Prompt:

12) Your bias needs a fake partner for a family event. Are you up for the task?

Prompt list can be found HERE.

Pairing: Stray Kids Chan x Reader

Genre: Fluff

.

"Your sister hates me," you muttered, trying to adjust yourself in Chan's bed.

"My sister doesn't haaate you," he hummed from his pallet on the floor beside you. "She just takes awhile to warm up to people."

"She knows, Chris," you grumbled, flopping over moodily so you could face where he was laying. "I don't know how, but she does."

Your stomach felt hollow as you replayed the afternoon's events and how exactly the two of you had landed in this situation. It was nearly a month ago now that Chan had casually asked you over coffee if you wanted to visit home with him for his brother's graduation. After you had kindly declined, he went on to list the reasons why this was such an important thing.

Namely, that he had told his parents that he had a partner in order for them to get off his case about it.

"They feel like I work too much," he grumbled.

"You do," you had agreed knowingly.

Chan shot you a dirty look. "And getting into a relationship would help me take a step back and enjoy myself, but I enjoy myself just fine!"

"Oh yeah, sleeping three hours a night and being in chronic pain is a blast," you muttered, stirring your coffee with a straw.

"So you agree with them," he had smiled. "And therefore, you volunteer?"

And you had. During the ten hour flight, you tried not to think too hard about what you were actually doing, but Chan had made it difficult. Sitting beside you, he rattled off facts and memories of his family that he thought may come up in conversation that you should know. Granted, you were friends, so you had always had at least a surface level understanding of how his family dynamic worked, but now you'd really be put to the test.

It seemed as if as soon as you had set foot on Australian soil, the nightmare had began. Of course his parents were overzealous with excitement that they got to meet you, but his siblings? Not so much. His brother stayed pretty detached, while his sister could only look at you warily. You weren't sure where you went wrong. You had sucked it up and allowed Chan to hold your hand, let him put his hand on your lower back, and even kissed him on the cheek once. All things considered, you should've gotten an Oscar for your performance. It didn't matter if the simple skin to skin contact had repeatedly sent shivers across your body and caused your face to warm. You wouldn't examine that part too closely.

"Maybe we're not laying it on thick enough," you whispered more to yourself than to Chan.

"And how do you suggest we do that?" he chuckled. He rolled over to look up at you from his floor-bed. "More skinship is only going to make her make fun of us, Y/N."

"I'm not talking about skinship..." you said slowly, trying to gather your thoughts. "I'm talking about familiarity."

From the dim lighting of the mood lamps behind the bed, you could see Chan's face contort with confusion. "We are familiar with each other."

Taking a deep breath, you leaned over the edge of the bed to look at him more directly. "Physical familiarity, Chris."

"Why do those two words together make me blush?" he laughed nervously.

You rolled your eyes. "I mean, we don't act fluidly together. We're not used to cuddling, or holding each other's hands, or knowing how to act completely comfortable around one another."

"I get what you're saying," he nodded. "We don't know how to interact when we're sharing the same space."

"Exactly," you said, relieved he had caught up. "What did you think I meant?"

"It would be better if I didn't say it out loud."

You laughed, trying to maintain your courage. "Would you be okay with sharing the bed with me?"

"When you say it like thaaaat," he sang. "I'm not too sure if my first thought was entirely off base."

"I'm not trying to corrupt you!" you gasped. "Not like you need any help in that."

"I am the picture of innocence and purity, thank you very much." You didn't have to look at him to know he was grinning.

"Did those words burn as they were leaving your mouth?"

"Okay, first, rude," he said, finally sitting up. "And two, why am I getting into bed with you then?"

"I, uh," you said quietly. "Want to try something."

"Sounds not suspicious at all," he sighed. Throwing off his covers, he got to his feet, and moved slowly around the bed. Crawling under the blankets, he lay flat on his back, eying you skeptically. "Now what?"

"Umm..." you hummed, totally winging it as you went. "Roll onto your side?"

"Rolling," he confirmed as he faced you. Your bodies were so close at this point, it made the next action easier. Scooting forward, you nestled your body into his.

"Is this okay?" you whispered, refusing to look up. Your eyes remained level with his collarbones and you were going to keep it that way until you could tell your heart to calm down.

"Yep," he said a bit too loud. "Totally fine. Why wouldn't it be?"

You attempted to keep your breathing even, but it was difficult when he was breathing erratically himself.

"I...uh...I don't know what to do with my hands." His voice was a bit more rough than it had been previously.

"Do we cuddle? I assume you've cuddled before?"

"Of course I have!" he said quickly. "And I've had no complaints!"

"Then maybe, you know, we should try doing it?" you winced. You could practically hear Chan's gears spinning as he tried to sort things out.

Swallowing loud enough for you to hear, Chan wrapped his arm around your lower back and pulled you close, eliminating what little space there had been between your bodies.

Your face was now tucked into the crook of his shoulder, and god, did he smell good. Something musky with an undertone of vanilla mingled so well on his skin that you couldn't stop sniffing.

"Are you comfortable?" he asked quietly.

You were more than comfortable. You didn't know if you had ever felt this safe in your entire life. Chan had always been a protective friend who you admired greatly for his work ethic and morality. You had always kept any romantic thoughts at bay because of that. He was your friend, Chan. Not this wildly hot and respectful gentleman, Chris. You could never even fantasize about that side of him because it would never happen like that between the two of you...right?

"Very," you finally answered.

"I can see your point," he continued, his voice barely above a breath.

"My point?" you asked. Your head was swimming with every inappropriate thought you could imagine, not how the two of you had gotten there.

"How realistic can we be if we've never actually been this close? How can I act like I know how your skin feels on mine without actually holding you?"

"Right," you croaked. "This. Totally great idea by me. You're welcome."

You could feel the laugh rumble through Chan's chest. "Are you sure you're okay? If you're uncomfortable, we can-"

"Chris," you whispered. "I am irrationally comfortable right now."

"Oh," he said quietly. His fingers had began to move in small circles on the section of your lower back where your shirt had ridden up. "I was thinking..."

"I didn't see the smoke coming out of your ears," you chuckled.

"You'd have to look at me first," he said, a bit more seriously than you had expected.

Blinking up at him in surprise, you tilted your head back so you could actually hold eye contact.

"Much better," he managed. His voice was more gravelly than you had ever heard it before. "I was thinking maybe I could try something? But I need to make sure you're okay with it first."

"I told you-"

"No," he said finitely. "This is different."

The words you were going to say evaporated from your throat immediately. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay," you confirmed.

"Okay," he repeated.

Tilting his head slowly down, the realization hit you. He was going to kiss you, and you were far more excited than you should be.

Moving your face forward as well, your eyes fluttered closed, waiting for the inevitable contact...until you felt the smallest kiss...

On the tip of your nose.

Letting out a surprise laugh, you opened your eyes again to find him grinning at you.

"I just wanted to see if you were really okay," he laughed.

"You absolute tease!" you groaned, embarrassment flooding you at his small trick.

"Can I try again?" he asked, biting his lip. You could see the amusement and hope bright in his eyes.

"If you must," you nodded.

This time, Chan moved much less slowly as his lips finally met yours. Catching your mouth and tilting your face upward just by the pressure of the kiss, you were surprised to hear a small groan slip from the back of your throat. Seeming to give him the boost of approval that he needed, Chan's hand moved from your waist to your neck. His fingers were a whisper against your skin as he chose that time to deepen the kiss. Pulling your bottom lip between his teeth, it was his turn to groan as he roughly let go and caught your mouth again. You had never been kissed like this. It wasn't casual and it wasn't fevered, but something more certain. Chan wanted you to know what this meant. He wanted to you to realize that if you were going to do this, you really would be. No more pretending. He was staking his claim here and now.

Trading kisses for what could have easily been ten minutes or an hour, you couldn't be sure, Chan finally kissed the corner of your mouth before withdrawing his face from yours.

"So maybe," he hummed, his voice the embodiment of positivity. "We don't have to fake it anymore."